#36’s Breeder speaks out

Comments

4 responses to “#36’s Breeder speaks out”

1. 

   November 25, 2008

   brent

   both.

   some kids just turn out bad bad bad and are doomed to be kicked out of home. a parent can only be expected to have so much patience: sure – a LOT of patience, but a finite lot.

   at least it would save this kid from being homeless.

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2. 

   November 26, 2008

   Melanie

   Did she adopt her foster kid for the paycheck or out of love? That is the big question. I think if it was love she would look for other options and we dont know if she tried things suck as counceling, meds, or even schools equipped to help problem children. If you dig deep enough and try hard you can find these services. I cried alot when my son started sliding downhill fast even considered suicide cause I thought I failed him, not once did I blame him. Eventually you realize feeling sorry for yourself doesnt help your child become a contributing member of society. Some behavior mod counceling and meds turned my ‘problem’ child into an honor roll student and student council president and I am a single mom and definetly barely within middle class. It’s not always a cake walk raising a child even your own but dont foster parenting programs tell these people that.

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3. 

   November 26, 2008

   karen

   you said he is her foster child, but make no mention of wherther she adopted him. if he was still a foster child then she had no rights or authority over him…in other words, she COULD NOT drop him off ANYWHERE. if he was still in foster care and was that hard for her to handle all she had to do was call her caseworker and make arrangements for him to be moved out of her home. if she had already adopted him, she could still contact dcs for referals and assistance in getting him the help he needed.

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4. 

   November 30, 2008

   Anon

   I watched the full 7 minute interview with the mother. I say that she was doing the right thing to drop him off. She adopted him, and so she wasn’t getting paid anything from the state. I think the system failed her. Kids don’t go into care because they are from stable, mentally well families. Some of them end up really messed up by their birth families (sometimes it’s genetic, sometimes its abuse). Adoptive families do all they can, but there are times when they (and I speak as a person who has an adopted sibling) truly can’t fix the person. Thankfully, my very messed up adopted brother was never violent with us, but he never was quite right in the head (his issues being caused by pre-natal exposure to drugs and alcohol).

   Had he been violent, I would hope that my parents would have put my safety above his discomfort. There’s only so much a parent can do, and if you’ve tried all that’s available to you and your child is still being violent with you or your other children, it is time to throw in the towel and give someone else the chance to ‘fix’ what’s broken.

   It’s not like she abandoned him in a ditch somewhere. She took him to a place where she knew he would be safe. I say kudos to her and every other adoptive parent who has tried their very best….I know I could never be an adoptive parent of a troubled child…my parents tried and only just managed to barely keep their marriage together. Broken, troubled kids, whether fostered or adopted are WAY more stressful on the family unit. I’m glad some people try, but I know I don’t have it in me and I wouldn’t do it to my other children (who aren’t perfect, by any means).

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